Thursday, July 1, 2010

thursday letters

Dear Florida,
I'd like to thank you in advance for welcoming myself, the husband and my two monkey children. I hope you treat us well. May your sun shine on us and may your beaches be totally awesome. I can't wait to put my feet in the sand!
Returning Floridian,

Dear Cat,
Please do not tear up the house while we are away. Be kind to the lady with the accent... she will feed you. It would be much appreciated if you didn't jump on my bed immediately after getting out of the litter box. Thanks.
Don't want to skin a cat,

Dear Rice Krispy Treats,
I hate you because you are soooooooo good. Who knew that cereal and marshmellows could be so deliciouslystickyyummy.
Happy Snacker

Dear Kid and Snugglebug,
As excited as I am about our trip, it really is for YOU. I am so excited to watch you both experience a week at the beach and can't wait to see your excitement at Disney World.
Giddy Mom,

Dear Hubby,
Love you. I can't wait to start our adventure. Let's see if we can break our habit of nearly everything going wrong during a trip...
Giddy Wife,

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Going back to the Homeland....

This is where I began. I don't remember a single thing about living here. I was 2 1/2 when my mom and I moved to Texas to live with my grandparents while my dad did a year tour in Korea. Then we moved to OK and well... the rest is history.
I haven't been to Florida in 27 1/2 years. And in about 48 hours I'll be landing in the homeland with the husband, the kid, and the snugglebug. We are "too excited to sleep"!!!
This will be the kid's third airplane ride and snugglebug's first. I have a feeling the little snugglebuggy will LOOOVE it. She really is the adventurous one, always telling her "bubbie" "it's okay, it's really not scary!" Oh, seriously love that girl. And on the other hand, I completely can relate to the kid. I'm usually telling him to be brave when I know without a doubt I'd be terrified too.
Our plans include, but are not limited to:
playing at the beach
going to a boardwalk or two
playing at the beach
playing at the beach
walking along the beach
getting tan on the beach
playing at the beach

I'm sure we'll be bringing back plenty of sand... whether we want to or not. ;)

Monday, June 14, 2010

thursday letters... ummm.... .

Dear Thursday,
You went too fast for me to post these letters, but I'm okay with that. It only brought the weekend to me quicker.
Love me some weekends,

Dear Kid,
Three bear hugs for suggesting that we all go get ice cream after dinner the other night. I love how your mind works.
Mom of a Braum's Kid,

Dear Snugglebug,
I am so proud of you for getting in grandma and grandpa's pool on your own and swimming around. You looked so cute in your Dora life jacket and swimming around so happily.
Mom of a little fishy,

Dear Hubby,
Thank you for taking the kids out so I could nap on Saturday. Thank you for still playing with me, I love that we can laugh and have fun.

Dear K,
Ya, next time you go to the pool, how about some 100 spf, because this sunburn you are rocking hurts.
Lookin like a lobster,

Dear Florida,
I can not wait to see you again. It's been 27 1/2 years since I last saw you. Can't wait to have sand in my toes for 7 days.
Former Floridian,

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Mommy Instinct

So I'm finally bull dozing over the Pediatrician and going with my Mommy Instinct. For YEARS now, I have complained to the pediatrician about the kid's eating habits. When he was a baby he'd eat almost any baby foods, though he never liked the meats. (can you blame him, just the smell of jarred baby food turkey will have me gagging) I remember his first Thanksgiving. He was 6 months old. We gave him jarred turkey and some very milky mashed potatoes. He hated it all. I was so new to this baby food stuff. I never even thought to ... make my own (I SOOO wish I had!!). I didn't really know what kind of foods to give him when he began to eat more solid foods. I'm such a horrible eater myself. I do not have a wide range of likes. Sure I eat veggies and fruits, but we're talking carrots, green beans, maybe peas, the simple things. No asparagus or beets or wait are beets a vegitable? See... I'm lost in this world of food. But still... I tried to give him a variety, or what I knew as variety. I would give him green beans and (after a year) peanut butter sandwhiches and macaroni and cheese (see.. horrible eater, I know). And he'd do okay with them. But, once he started going to "school" (I refuse to call it daycare and if you knew where he goes, you'd agree... its not a daycare) things seemed to change. While I love the school where he's been going for the last almost 5 years, their lunch program is a bit lacking. They have the same menu that alternates every two weeks. So one week its menu A, the next week its menu B and then back to menu A and so forth. Lunches are: fish sticks, pineapples, green beans, a roll, and milk. Thats just one example. Its not bad, but it sure could be better.
With a loss as to what to feed this child, who I assumed just had to eat "kid food" (wrong!), I followed the school's example and somehow it stuck. His favorite food: chicken nuggets. And it became the only thing he would eat. I totally blame myself for not offering him more of a variety.
As the years went on it only got worse. He hasn't had a vegitable in about 5 years. With the exception that just recently he has been eating spinach leaves. Which I try to give at every meal. But anyway... the child has a hard time trying new foods. And when I mean hard time, that's putting it mildly. We've tried every thing we can think of to get him to at least TRY something new. Sometimes it worked. Most of the time it didn't.
And most of the time if he did try something, he'd be so worked up over the thought of trying a new foods, that he'd start gagging before it was even in his mouth. Gagging to the point of throwing up once the food hit his tongue. So I'm left confused. Have I scared him? Is there something wrong?
Like I've said, for years I have told his pediatrician that the kid is EXTREMELY picky. I've told him the things he will eat and the doctor just shrugs it off saying, that well... some kids are just picky. Okay, I get that. But this is different. Its hard to describe, but it just is different. Something is off. My gut is telling me something is off.
So at this last well-child visit the doctor (probably tired of my complaining) suggested that the kid see an occupational therapist "if I felt the need". The office still hasn't called me back with a referral, so I took it into my own hands and called a center myself. We're getting him set up for an evaluation. I hope they can give us some answers.
Along with the eating issues, I feel that there are some other oddities going on as well. (Not that I think my kid is "odd", I love him with all my heart and soul, but my gut is telling me that there's something off) For instance, he is EXTREMELY sensitive to light. The little booger wears sunglasses when its cloudy. And getting a decent picture of him? Yah, right. He hates the flash, will close his eyes. Take him outside for a pic and he squints so badly.
He has little obsessions that change every 6-12 months. First it was the movie Madagascar. Everything was about that movie. Then he discovered Diego and it was all down-hill from there.
Now we're onto Legos and Toy Story.
As I write all this I think that he just seems like a regular kid. But I just can't place into words my exact feelings on why I think what I think. So frustrating.
I go back and forth on feeling that he might be autistic or have asperger's. But a main part of those two is the social aspect, as in people with autism and asperger's have a hard time with social situations. And that simply is not my child. He thrives on social situations, but at the same time he seems to be different socially than other children he is around.
I feel like I'm trying to shove him into some mold of what a "regular child" is. And I hate that. I just fear for him. I fear that he won't fit in (maybe because I've always thought of myself as socially awkward) or get picked on or made fun of. But when I drop him off at school his friends see him and shout his name excitedly and run to give him hugs. That should tell me that everything is going to be a-ok. It should.


Thursday, May 27, 2010

thursday letters

The Kid
Kindergarten Class of 2010

Dear Kid,
Congratulations on graduating from kindergarten! I know you have done so well in school and I only hope that you carry your love for learning with you throughout the rest of your life. You make me proud. And I loved that you were the only one bee-bopping to the song that your class sang.
Love you always,

Dear Snugglebug,
Your daddy spoils you and I'm quite alright with that. I love that he has a partner to go eat Chinese food with. I hope you two remain this close, even thru those crazy moody teenage years.
Love you always,

Dear Husband,
Its about darn time you came home! We have all missed you. I hate that I get "used to" you being gone. Life is much better with you here.
I love you more than being the remote control holder,

Dear Summer,
Its nice to see you again. My flip flops have missed you. I could do without your humidity, but if it means spending days at the pool then I'm game.
Sweaty and Lovin It,

Dear Summer Vacation,
Are you here yet?!?!?! We've been anxiously planning YOU for mooonths now. Hurry and get here. We all need it. We NEED you! I'm so happy that we'll be able to surprise the kiddos with a trip to *DISNEYWORLD* while we're enjoying you.
Giddy with Anticipation,

Dear Pediatrician,
We have a six year old check up tomorrow. You are always so chillaxed and I never have many questions for you, but be prepared. Tomorrow I will be THAT parent.
Billions of Questions,

Dear Friend that will not be named here,
You are really no good for me. I feel like you pushed your way into my life and at a time when I was lonely and I let you. You have a miserable attitude and I don't like being around you. I've tried to stick it out since we have been through some traumatic stuff together, but I'm not so sure I can anymore. I'm slowly slipping away and I kind of like it. I'll be praying for you to find the happiness you deserve.
Waving the white flag,

Dear Fat K,
No Exercise + Unhealthy food = you. You know what you need to do. DO IT!
Pumping Myself Up,

Tuesday, May 25, 2010


May 25, 2004






May 25, 2010

6 years of YOU!!! 6 years to love you, to know you, to laugh with you, to laugh BECAUSE of you, to watch you grow, to watch you learn, to jump for joy in your accomplishments even if its something like blowing a bubblegum bubble. 6 years of being YOUR mommy.
Happy Birthday my 6 year old boy!!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

thursday letters

Dear Husband,
So sorry I didn't feel like talking yesterday. I was worn thin. I hope today's chat more than made up for it. I miss you!
Forever you Wife,

Dear Marriage Ref,
I'm rolling in laughter every Thursday night!! Thank you for showing real (and sometimes quite insane) couples and their "issues". Thank you for feeling free to poke fun out in the open! It surely makes me seem a little more normal to my husband. At least I don't label my socks!!!
Side Split,

Dear Kid,
I'm only letting you sleep in my bed tonight because when you do, you sleep longer in the morning. Please don't disappoint.
Sleepy Mom,

Dear Grown Women that share a bathroom on the 2nd floor of my office building,
Grossed out on floor 2,

Dear Snugglebug,
Why does it take you an hour and a half to fall asleep? No wonder you are a bear to wake up. You are becoming more and more like me every day.
Sweet Dreams,

Dear Charger,
I love you. I've loved you for 2 1/2 months. I love you even more after driving Husband's car for a few days. I hope you enjoyed your break from Veggie Tales and Wow Wow Wubzy. I know you secretly enjoy me blaring the Dixie Chicks all.the.time. Thank you for maintaining that new car smell and for having that powerful "VROOM" when I start the engine. You are so fun!
Driving Happy,

Tuesday, May 11, 2010


The kiddos and I survived their first tornado last night! WHEW! It really wasn't that bad where we live, though in our state any tornado is scary. I lived through the infamous May 3rd tornado and every since then, its really changed the way we Oklahomans view tornadoes. I'd like the thing that on the whole, we take the warnings far more seriously.
I had just turned on the news while the kids were playing in the bath when my mother-in-law called. I told her we would come over after dinner. But after their bath, it was looking ugly out, so we packed up and made the long trip ... 2 streets over! We were there about 2 minutes when the sirens were going off. We managed to get my car and their cars all in the garage. And went straight to the closet. And then the power went off.
Kid was scared. Really scared. I told him I wouldn't leave him. Snugglebug thought it was fun and said in her wannabeteenagertalk "I'm not even scared". Oiy! That girl.
We were in the closet for about a minute and it was over. And I must say, its kind of a rush coming out to survey the damage. All the neighbors are out and about, sharing their stories. Thankfully we got by with no damage at all and the neighbors had minimal damage. It could have been worse, and it was a lot worse for others in our state.
So, we survived. We still have no electricity at my house, although the in-laws' power came back on last night. What a night.

Monday, May 10, 2010

Mother's Day

I didn't buy my mom a card for Mother's Day. I did not get her flowers. I did not take her to dinner. I didn't even call. I meant to get a card. I did. I just put it off until it was too late.
We've never been close. Sure we can chit-chat about stuff in our lives, mostly superficial and definitely NOTHING deep, nothing emotional. .. Ever. I don't know why that is. Its just always been that way. And quite frankly I'm done being sad about it or wanting it to change. It is the way it is. HOWEVER. I will. NOT. let that be how things are between my children and me. Now, I know my children and I may go through rough times where I am just the last person on earth that they want to tell something to, but in general, I want them to be able to talk to me, to cry on my shoulder, to know without a doubt in their minds or hearts that I love them. That I'll love them forever.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

thursday letters

Dear Kindergarten Teacher:
Thank you for loving my kid so and teaching him to read and write and all that important math stuff. You rock.
I appreciate you,

Dear Boss:
I've heard the story 4 times already. Next time I'll stop you and just tell YOU your story.
Heard it,

Dear Right Arm and Hand:
I don't know what's wrong with you. You hurt me. I don't like your severe coldness, I don't like that you interfere with my texting and blogging and facebooking while I'm at work. I don't have time to deal with dr visits and tests and blah, blah, blah....

Dear Mail Lady:
You are super nice and sweet, but for the love of all things sacred, could you please not slam the door
Sensitive Ears,

Dear Kid:
You're almost 6. Please stop getting older. I can't take it.
Teary Mommy,

Thank you for the inspiration!!!
New Reader,

Dear Husband:
I miss you. Sometimes being an Army wife stinks. But it makes me appreciate you when you are home. I love you.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010


What a way to start a blog... it's my 9th Wedding Anniversary. And as I look back on the day, it was beautiful, mostly sunny, windy, I was a ball of nerves... I can't help but to dwell on my bridesmaids instead of the union on two souls. Don't get me wrong, I love my husband, wouldn't trade him for the world, but at this point in my life I'm thinking about those three women. Ya, only three. I've since stopped speaking with all three of them. Its sad really. Each for their own reason... or lack of reason really. Oh, I have two of them as friends on facebook, but we all know that doesn't count as really being connected with someone. But.. my maid of honor. I think about her just about every day. Probably because we had a huge fight about a year, 3 months, 2 weeks, and 5 days ago and haven't spoken since. It pains me. It really does. And I'm trying so hard to let God heal me, to let him show me the ways in which I was wrong, but its just not working. I suppose I should explain more, but I owe it to my hubby to put these thoughts aside for at least today and focus on him. on us. on 9 years. the good times. the AWESOME times. the really really bad tears-of-rage times. the sad times. the I-am-lucky-my-hubby-is-alive times. Oh, ALL the times. 9 years and he's still my best friend and my love.